The pilot for The Muppets debuted on ABC last night, and there are bushels of familiar characters appearing as the gang puts together its fictional late-night talk show starring Miss Piggy. Hopefully the show incorporates different Muppets each week, so instead of a standard GIF and a Graf, we’re going to try a power ranking of the five best characters in the latest episode.
1. Animal
The musical guest this week was Imagine Dragons ... which is about as thrilling a choice as One Republic was at Apple's most recent event. But it was great to see Animal trash some of their gear, and he got the line of the week, highlighted in the GIF above, about why he can’t handle the touring life anymore.
2. Miss Piggy
The strangest part of the Muppets-as-real-celebrities gambit in the marketing for this series was the pocket of people who wanted to frame Piggy as an abusive partner to Kermit. They’re puppets, and not of the Punch and Judy variety. But the best moment of the episode—for its mockumentary style and its not-yet-bearable breakup plot—is a shot of Piggy getting to the point of tears outside a Pitch Perfect 2 screening, captured by a paparazzi camera across the street. Piggy is a fabulous diva, and she deserves to be, so she needs to be the foundational rock of this series going forward, especially if Kermit is going to be cracking fat jokes.
3. Fozzie Bear
The B-plot throughout the pilot centers on Fozzie meeting his girlfriend (played by Riki Lindhome, of Garfunkel and Oates and Another Period) Becky's parents—the phenomenal Jere Burns plays her dubious and borderline prejudicial father. As the resident terrible comedian, of course he’s Piggy’s bumbling announcer, the Steve Higgins to her Jimmy Fallon, the Andy Richter to her Conan.
4. Sweetums
Of all the Muppets with minor roles (Bobo the Bear working on the set, Sam the Eagle as Standards & Practices), the funniest match is the massive Sweetums working the cue cards. He has an inadvertent hand in one of the best gags in the episode, mixing up lines he feeds to Fozzie while introducing Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem.
5. Tom Bergeron
The Dancing with the Stars host's minor role is the perfect example of the kind of corporate synergy that is a part of late-night talk shows and all Muppets films. But it's nice to see the marketing requirement used to make Bergeron into a tragic figure, insulted as not a big enough star to potentially sub-in for Elizabeth Banks, and then forgotten by Kermit and Scooter when he's bumped from the show.
