Doctor Who Recap: "Closing Time"

Doctor Who

Last Time:The God Complex

SPOILER ALERT!

Sophie is leaving Craig on his own, and she is worried. Remember Craig and Sophie from last season’s episode “The Lodger?” OK, quick recap: While trying to save Amy from a timey-wimey mishap, The Doctor temporarily finds lodging with Craig who, unbeknownst to him, has an alien living in the flat above him. The Doctor figures this all out, plays a game of football — real football, not that American stuff — and manages to get rid of the alien and play matchmaker for Craig and his friend Sophie. Ok, you are up to date.

Sophie and Craig are now, well not married, but living together — permanently — and she is heading away for a weekend to rest:

Craig: I can cope on my own! Now please go and have a rest. You need it. I love you. Sophie: I love you too. And thank you for this. And I do know you can cope on your own. And I may have drawn some arrows in the fridge. Craig: Okay, really have to go now.

But no one is certain of Craig’s abilities to cope on his own, lead of all Craig. So it’s fortunate that the Doctor show up on a little social call:

Craig: Mum, it’s not just you, I’m phoning everybody. I’m texting the world. “Craig Owens can do it on his own”! No one is coming to help me. [There is a knock at the door]. Mum, I’m going to have to call you back. [hangs up] I’m coping, I’m coping on my own. I’m coping on my own. I’m coping on my own… The Doctor: [delighted with himself] Hello Craig. I’m back! Craig: She didn’t… How could she phone you? The Doctor: How did who phone me? Nobody phoned me, I’m just here. [looking at house] Oh, you’ve redecorated! I don’t like it. Craig: It’s a different house. We moved. The Doctor: Yes. That’s it. Craig: Doctor, what are you doing here? The Doctor: Social call. Thought it about time I tried one out. How are you? Craig: I’m fine. The Doctor: This is the bit where I say “I’m fine too”, isn’t it? “I’m fine too.” Good. Love to Sophie. ‘Bye! [turns to leave, but lights flicker] Something’s wrong.

Something is indeed wrong.

Meanwhile, that something is afoot at Sanderson & Granger department store. A clerk closing up shop late at night is confronted in the dressing room by a rather battered looking Cyberman. We know that that can’t lead to anything good.

Oh, Sophie and Craig have a had a baby as well as having moved.

The Doctor: So when you say, “on your own”… Craig: I meant on my own with the baby, yes. Because no one thinks I can cope on my own with the baby. Which is so unfair because… I can’t cope on my own with him. I can’t! He just cries all the time… I mean, do they have off switches? The Doctor: Human beings? No. Believe me, I’ve checked. Craig: No, babies. The Doctor: Same difference.

And yet again The Doctor exhibits his unique ability to talk to the babies.

Craig: What are you doing here anyway? The Doctor: Yes, he likes that, Alfie. Though personally he prefers to be called Stormaggedon, Dark Lord of All. Craig: Sorry, what? The Doctor: That’s what he calls himself. Craig: How do you know that? The Doctor: I speak baby.

I would prefer Stormaggedon over Alfie any day. I’m not sure why the Doctor then grinds pepper on Craig.

The Doctor: No! He’s your dad, you can’t just call him “Not Mum.” Craig: Not mum? The Doctor: That’s you. “Also Not Mum”. That’s me. And everybody else is… “peasants”. That’s a bit unfortunate. Craig: What are you here for? What’s happening? The Doctor: Just popped in to say hello. Craig: You don’t do that. I checked the upstairs when we moved in. It’s real. And next door, both sides. They’re humans. Is it the fridge? Are there aliens in my fridge? The Doctor: I just want to see you, Craig. Cross my hearts. Been knocking around on my own for a bit. Bit of a farewell tour.

Yep, as we hear throughout this episode, the Doctor is saying good-bye. In and out, nobody gets hurt. Well, until the street lamps begin to flicker:

The Doctor: Just go, shouldn’t notice things. Just go, stop noticing, just go, stop noticing, just go…. Stop it! Am I noticing? No. No, I am not. And what I am not doing is scanning around for electrical fluctuations. Oh shut up, you. I’m just dropping in on a friend. The last thing I need right now is a patina of teleport energy. I’m going, do you here me, going? Not staying, going. I am through saving them. I am going away now.

But you know that’s another thing that will never happen. Next we find the Doctor, he’s working as a sales assistant in the toy department of the very same store where we last saw the Cyberman. I wonder if there’s a connection?

The Doctor: It goes up, tiddly up! It goes down, diddly down. For only £49.99, which I personally think is a bit steep. But then again, it’s your parents’ cash and they’ll only waste it on boring stuff like lamps and vegetables. Yawn!

I didn’t say that he was a very good sales assistant. And Craig show up:

Craig: What the hell are you doing here? The Doctor: I’m the Doctor, I work in a shop now. I am here to help. Look, they gave me a badge with my name on it in case I forget who I am. Very thoughtful as that does happen.

The Doctor: You look awful. Craig: Well, I haven’t slept, have I. I still can’t stop him crying. I even tried singing to him last night. The Doctor: Yeah, he did mention that. He thought you were crying too. He didn’t get a wink.

Just then something fast, low and silver zips by. That can’t be good. The Doctor tells Craig about all of the people who have gone missing recently. Put that together with power outages, and you’ve got a mystery.

The Doctor: Just between you, me and Stormy—don’t want to frighten any punters. Someone’s been using the teleport below right here in the shop. Missing people last seen here in this area. Before you ask: CCTV’s been wiped. Craig: But teleport? A big— A teleport? Like a “beam-me-up” teleport like you see in Star Trek? The Doctor: Exactly! Someone’s been using a beam-me-up Star Trek teleport. Could be disguised as anything.

Just one little geeky point: Doctor Who has always referred to transmats, not teleporters. Ok, breath in, out, in, out. Continue.

So The Doctor Boards a broken lift (elevator in Americanese) with Craig and Stormy in tow, and the store suddenly seem to blink out of existence, and find themselves in a spaceship,which Craig seems not to notice at first as the Doctor tries to distract him (expressing his hidden love for Craig), but that can only last so long :

Craig: Oh, my god! The Doctor: Or we could just hold hands, if that would make you feel more comfortable. Craig: What is happening?! The Doctor: Well first of all, I don’t really love you. Except as a friend. Craig: [Cyberman approaches] What is that?!

The Doctor does something with his sonic screwdriver, and they are once again back in the lift.

Craig: Okay, what the hell just happened?! The Doctor: They must have linked the teleport relay to the lift. But I’ve fused it. They can’t use that again. They’re stuck up there in their spaceship. Craig: What were those things? The Doctor: Cybermen. Craig: A ship. Space ship. We were in space.

The Doctor has fused the Transmat… errr… Transporter, so the Cybermen can no longer beam down from their ship, at least for now. The Doctor wants Craig to go away, afraid of what might happen to him if he stays, but Craig still has confidence in the Doctor:

The Doctor: Craig, take Alfie and go. Craig: No. The Doctor: No? Craig: No. I remember from last time. People got killed. People that didn’t know you. I know where it’s safest for me and Alfie and that’s right next to you. The Doctor: Is that so? Craig: Yeah, you always win. You always survive. The Doctor: [looks wistful] Those were the days.

They begin their investigation of the department store, splitting up to cover more ground. The Doctor also admits that he keeps a human around as a companion:

Craig: Where am I investigating? The Doctor: Look around. Ask questions. People like it when you’re with a baby. Babies are sweet. People talk to you. That’s why I usually take a human with me. Craig: So I’m your baby. The Doctor: You’re my baby!

The Doctor soon discovers rumors of a “silver rat thing” running around and begins to investigate.

Craig, on the other hand, is not so smooth. While investigating in ladies’ wear, he’s soon mistaken for a pervert. But everyone loves the Doctor:

The Doctor: Well, you love me. I’ve never excreted any weird alien gasses into you. Craig: I don’t love you. Don’t start that again. The Doctor: [to Stormy] Yeah, I know. Of course he does. Of course you do! We’re partners. Craig: Yeah, but I did exactly what you would have done and I nearly got arrested. The Doctor: Stormy thinks you should believe in yourself more. Craig: Great, so now my baby’s reviewing me.

And then the Doctor sees Amy and Rory across the store. Amy is signing an autograph, and the Doctor looks up to see a large display poster with Amy’s face advertising a perfume called “Petrichor: For the Girl Who’s Tired of Waiting.” In case you have forgotten, petrichor is the smell of rain on dry ground.

He wants to go to her, but doesn’t and the quickly leave, and the moment passes.

The two “partners” get into the department store building after hours to investigate, and catch the cybermat. Cut little bugger… until it opens it’s mouth to reveal some nasty looking

Craig: [panicked] Metal rat, real mouth. Metal Rat, real mouth. Metal rat… The Doctor: I know, stop screaming.

The Doctor hears a screaming and goes to investigates. It was George, the guard, who was captured by a Cyberman. A Cyberman sneaks up on the Doctor and knocks him out.

Craig: Are you okay? The Doctor: I should be dead, but the arm it chopped me with, it was damaged. Old, spare parts. Must have changed those missing people. Craig: Changed the missing into cybermen? Why didn’t they change you? The Doctor: Long story. I’m not exactly compatible. But why are they using spare parts? Why? Everything I find out makes less sense.

The Doctor and Craig regroup back at their “base” — Craig’s house — with their captured Cybermat, which the Doctor begins to dissect. but Craig has to run out for milk, leaving the Doctor to take care of Stormy. While calming Stormy down, the Doctor monologues about how old he has gotten

The Doctor: Stop crying. You’ve got a lot to look forward to, you know. A normal human life on Earth. Mortgage repayments. The nine-to-five. A persistent, nagging sense of spiritual emptiness. Save the tears for later, boy-o. Oh, that was crabby. That was old. But I am old, Stormy. I am so old. So near the end.

The Doctor: You know when I was little like you I dreamt of the stars. Yeah. I think it’s fair to say, in the language of your age, that I lived my dream. I owned the stage. Gave it a hundred and ten percent. I hope you have as much fun as I did, Alfie.

But, as should be expected, the Cybermat wakes up:

The Doctor: Alfie, why is there a sinister beeping coming from behind me?

The Doctor and Stormy flee the house, getting locked out, just as Craig reenters and is attacked by the Cybermat.

The Doctor: It must be shielded from metastatic energy. Of course! Craig: Of course! The Doctor: Don’t worry, I have an app for that.

The Doctor reprograms the Cybermat, while telling Craig his woes:

The Doctor: No. I am a stupid selfish man. Always have been. I should have made you go. I should never have come here. Craig: What would have happened if you hadn’t come? Who else knows about cybermen and teleports. The Doctor: I put people in danger. Craig: Stop beating yourself up! If it weren’t for you, this whole planet would be in absolute ruin. The Doctor: Craig, very soon I won’t be here. My time is running out. I don’t mean Exidor. “Silence will fall when the question is asked.” I don’t even know what the question is. I always knew I’d die still asking. The thing is, Craig, it’s tomorrow. Can’t put it off anymore. Tomorrow is the day I…

…And Craig has fallen asleep. The Doctor heads off on his own early the next morning, looking for how the Cybermen are getting back down from their spaceship:

The Doctor: They must have had a back-up system. Something complicated. Something powerful. Something shielded. Something like… a door? A door. A desillium bonded steel door disguised as a wall. That… is… cheating! So… They didn’t teleport down. They climbed up.

The Doctor climbs down and finds the cybership, buried underground, with half built Cybermen skulking about. He gives them a choice, to deactivate themselves, or he’ll do it for them. Craig shows up — don’t worry, Stormy has been left in capable hands — and tries to fend off the Cybermen with a pricing gun. After that fails, the Cybermen capture him, intending to convert him into the Cyberleader:

The Doctor: Listen to me. I believe in you. I believe you can do this. I’ve always believed. In all of you, all my life. I’m going to die, Craig. Tomorrow I’m going to die. But I don’t mind if you just prove me right! Craig!

But what saves the day? Love. Craig hears Stormy crying over the speaker, and his love allows how to fight agains the transformation… with love:

The Doctor: That was another review. Ten out of ten! Craig: The Cybermen. They blew up. I blew ’em up with love. The Doctor: No. That’s impossible. And also grossly sentimental and over-simplistic. You destroyed them because of the deeply-ingrained hereditary human trait to protect one’s own genes. Which in turn triggered a… a… Um. Yeah. Love. You blew them up with love.

The Doctor says his good-byes, but it’s clear that there is something wrong:

The Doctor: Well. Now it’s time. I have to go. Craig: Doctor, I know that something’s wrong. I can help you. The Doctor: Nobody can help me. I hope Sophie won’t mind. I need these {he grabs the too-familiar blue envelopes}. Craig: Where are you going to go? The Doctor: America. Craig: Sophie will be home any second. Are you sure? The Doctor: I can’t miss this appointment, Craig. Goodbye, mate. Craig: Wait there. One second. [he comes back and puts a Stetson on the Doctor’s head]

…And the Doctor is off again:

The Doctor: Well then, old girl. One last trip, eh?

But the episode is not quite over. River song is looking through her diary, when a familiar one-eyed woman appears along with the Silence:

Madame Kovarian: So they made you a doctor today, did they? Doctor River Song. How clever you are. [pointing to the words “22/04/11 5:02 PM. Lake Silencio”] You understand what this is, don’t you? River: According to some accounts, it’s the day the Doctor dies. Madame Kovarian: By Silencio Lake… on the Plain of Sighs… an impossible astronaut will rise from the deep. And strike the Time Lord dead. River: It’s a story. Madame Kovarian: And this is where it begins. [Soldiers come in with the Astronaut’s space suite]

The final verses of the children’s rhyme we’ve been hearing snippets of are finally sung:

Madame Kovarian: “Tick tock goes the clock, and all the years they fly. Tick tock and all too soon, your love will surely die.” [River in the space suite in the lake, a spooky child’s voice sings] Tick tock goes the clock, He cradled her and he rocked her. Tick tock goes the clock, ’til River kills the Doctor.

The penultimate episode of this series (season to Americans) is amongst my favorites, and certainly my favorite of the last half of the series. The humor was spot on, the villains well played, and the story just touching enough without getting too mushy. Maybe it’s because I’m the father of my own little Stormaggedon, but the father/son storyline was something I could very much relate to. And, although Amy and Rory were missed, it’s good to see Matt Smith able to interact with other characters on the screen.

Now, I’m just wondering how they are going to tie this all up in a single episode.

More great quotes

The Doctor: On your own you said, but you’re not. You’re not on your own. Increased sulfur emissions… and look at the state of this place. What are you not telling me? Craig: Doctor, please… The Doctor: Shush! Craig: No you shush! The Doctor: Shush! Craig: Shush! The Doctor: No you shush!

The Doctor: So what did you call him? Will I blush? Craig: No, we didn’t call him “The Doctor.” The Doctor: No, I didn’t think you would. Craig: He’s called Alfie.

The Doctor: Here’s the lift! Craig: It says it’s out of order. The Doctor: Not anymore. See? “Here to help.” Craig: It says “danger.” The Doctor: Oh rubbish! Lifts aren’t dangerous. Craig: Do I look like I’m stupid? [Stormmaggedon laughs]. The Doctor: Quiet, Stormy!

Craig: Doctor, are you going to kiss me? The Doctor: Yes, Craig. Yes I am. Would you like that? Bit out of practice but I’ve had some wonderful feedback.

Val: Hope you don’t mind my saying, Doctor, but I think you look ever so sweet. You and your partner and your baby. The Doctor: Partner. Yes. I like it. Is it better than companion? Val: Companion. Sounds old fashioned. There’s no need to be coy these days.

Craig: I bet you excrete some sort of gas that makes people love you. The Doctor: Would that I could, Craig.

Craig: Couldn’t you put that on quiet? The Doctor: No! Its a sonic screwdriver! Sonic equals sound.

Craig: Why do I need a papoose? The Doctor: Alfie wants you attached to him. You are far too slow when he summons you. Craig: Is he going to stop giving me marks? The Doctor: Never. It’s parenthood. Couldn’t you just have got a babysitter? [Stormy gurgles] No. Any babysitter. It doesn’t have to be a hot one.

Next Time: “The Wedding of River Song”