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Valentine's day? Oh please. Not only is this hallmark holiday designed to guilt geeks into parting ways with beaucoup dollars, it also separates us from the things we really love — our gadgets. Screw that. Here are 10 items we’d really love to spend quality time with on the 14th day of February. —Daniel Dumas and Jose Fermoso
1. Ferrari 599 GTB Fiorano
Until Virgin Galactic gets its ass in gear, this is the closest most of us mortals will get to blasting off into space. Powered by 611 ponies with a power-to-weight ratio of less than 5.8 lbs/hp, the Fiorano can do 0-60 in only 3.7 seconds. That’s faster than a Kawasaki Ninja 500R. Yes, it’s quicker than a motorcycle. Believe us when you’re hitting 205 mph on some a backcountry road you’ll forget that conversation you had with the checkout girl at Safeway who said “I just want to be friends.” Of course, if you’re driving around in one of these, you probably won’t have a hard time scoring a date anyway.
Price: $260,000 (est)
Cost: People calling you a douche bag behind your back
Get it: In Italy
2. XEL-1 OLED from Sony
11-inch screen? Ridiculously expensive? Whateva! What really matters is that this Organic Light Emitting Diode produces an incredible 1,000,000:1 contrast ratio, blacks darker than Dick Cheney’s soul, and images so realistic, you’ll swear you’re an extra on the set of Lost. The best part? This OLED is not a vaporware pipedream. You can waltz right into a Sony store and pick one up right now.
Price: $2500
Cost: You paid $227 per inch of screen space. Think about it.
Get it at: Did you hear us? Any Sony store that has it in stock
__3. Wow Wee FemiSapien __
Yes, your relationship with this ‘droid may violate every single law of robotics. (And probably some state and federal penal codes too.)
But seriously, who cares? The FemiSapien is just like a robosapien, except it’s poured into a hot-as-hell Barbie doll chassis. What you do with it behind closed doors, however, is your own business.
Price: TBA
Cost: Once you go bot, meat space girls just aren’t hot.
Get it: wowwee.com
__4. Xbox 360 Elite + Mass Effect __
The dissolution of many relationships can be traced back to affairs with this black box. Not to worry, even after your S.O. has thrown all your stuff on the curb, you can still sooth your shattered psyche with
Mass Effect, a wholly immersive shooter that features stunning graphics, an open ended plot line, and hot human on alien love action.
Price: $60 for game, $450 for console
Cost: Past/ future girlfriends, hygiene, job
Get it at: xbox.com
5. The Chumby
Yes, you hate your alarm clock. You kinda sort-of chucked it through a window when the snooze button malfunctioned. Time to get something you actually won't mind waking up next to in the morning.
Give the Chumby a shot. This device streams personal music channels, monitors your Facebook page, and can directly access your Flickr and
Picasa photo net services. And it’s only $200. Hey that’s cheaper than a 5-course, super-expensive small-plate meal at some hoity-toity bistro.
Price: $200
Cost: Getting out of bed on time for once
Get it at: chumby.com
6. Olympus E3 with 50-200mm F2.8-3.5 SWD telephoto lens
Sure she might try to fool you with a restraining order, but your crush is really just playing hard to get. See what she’s up to with this 10mp shooter that fires off pictures in RAW (12-bit), JPEG, RAW+JPEG
formats. And the 200mm telescoping lens ensures you can safely squeeze off frames from the comfort of those bushes across the street.
Price: $1700 for camera
Cost: An all expense paid trip to county!
Get it: olympus.com
7. The Panasonic 150-inch Plasma TV
What’s better than basking in the warm basking glow of TVs warm basking glow? Why the warm basking glow of a TV the size of Andorra! Revealed at CES 2008, this Kong-sized 150-inch plasma screen has 4 times the resolution of any current Panasonic TV. Oh yeah, did we mention it’s the size of almost three Danny DeVitos?
Price: $150,000
Cost: Ruined credit after you default on the third payment
Get it: panasonic.com, Bill Gates’ house
__8. Lib tech Skate Banana Board __
Screw going to the movies, make a date with a mountain instead. This yellow stick uses what’s called a reverse camber rocker to put more surface of the board on the mountain. What does this translate to? In deep powder, the Banana carves harder than a Boston Market employee on a smoked rump roast.
Price: $469
Cost: Multiple concussions
Get it: lib-tech.com
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9. Sony Mylo 2
It’s got games. It’s got Wi-Fi access. It’s got IM capability. It’s cute! Guess what it doesn’t have? A phone! Is that a problem? No, because if you’re rocking one of these, you’re probably not into getting numbers anyway.
Price: $300
Cost: Carrying a cell phone-like device that's not actually a cell phone
Get it: sonyusa.com
10. DB Double Truffle Burger
Got your heart broken? Fill that dark empty void with some cholesterol-saturated red meat. Sure this is not exactly a gadget, but there is nothing more instinctively satisfying than a ground prime rib burger, injected with red wine-braised short ribs, sprinkled with foie gras, and smattered with preserved black truffles. Chef Daniel Boulud’s monster creation is so good; you won’t mind the 6-week coma the monstrosity will undoubtedly put you in.
Price: $150
Cost: Three rounds with a defibrillator
Get it: at db Bistro Moderne, New York City and Daniel Boulud Brasserie in Las Vegas
