A maker of the "Eros SexGen Platinum Base Unit" (a device in the online virtual world Second Life) has filed suit against another person in the game for copyright infringement, claiming the second party is making exceedingly similar sex toys. So now apparently there's going to be a legal battle for the hearts, minds and bodily fluids of online avatar-based sex-havers. Just like Philip K. Dick predicted in 1967 in his novella The Eros SexGen Platinum Base Unit.
This won't be the end of it, of course. The virtual world is just swarming with lawsuits waiting to happen. For instance, I understand that Grand Theft Auto involves theft. Here are a few of the cases you'll see in the coming months.
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Anders v. Thanatog
Douglas Anders of Bellefontaine, Ohio, files suit against Thanatog, a warlock from Goldshire, Elwynn Forest, Azeroth, Bloodhoof Server. The suit alleges that "the defendant did knowingly and willfully, without lawful authority, aggro about 30 goblins in the Deadmines, preventing plaintiff from finishing the instance and retrieving the Cape of the Brotherhood, causing mental anguish and loss of wages when plaintiff skipped work to re-run the instance with someone who knows what 'stay near the left wall' means."
Suit is dismissed when the defense demonstrates that Anders doesn't know how to control his character's pet wolf and thus may have caused the aggro himself.
Totten v. RedOctane
Ray Totten, lead guitarist for the unsigned band The High Five, sues RedOctane, the developers of the Guitar Hero series, for allegedly making him unable to play guitar. His claim is that after 20 straight hours of playing Guitar Hero II, he was unable to play the guitar normally. He attempted to play a live gig with his band and was unable to move his hands from the top five frets of the guitar neck and unable to play more than one string. When the time came for his guitar solo he found himself attempting to replicate "Hangar 18" by Megadeth, then finally, in desperation, tilting his guitar to enter "Star Power" mode.
He finally prevailed in the suit, winning 15 dollars to cover gas, beer and the Bufferin he took after a bar patron threw a lowball glass at his head.
Brothers v. Nintendo
Mario Alexander Brothers, a 46-year-old floor manager from Urbana, Illinois, sues Nintendo Company Limited for using his name on various Mario Brothers games and associated merchandise. When asked why he waited so long before filing suit, Brothers says "Well, I was kind of hoping it was just a fad." Nintendo uses the defense that the games are technically spelled Mario Bros.
The case is dropped, but Nintendo faces a number of suits the next year from Mario Harrison Bros, Mario Peter Kart, Doctor Steve Mario, Mario Kendall Strikers, Mario Alan Sunshine and Star Evelyn Fox.
Sinderbrand v. Lessard
Joseph "killUpain" Sinderbrand files a patent for "a method of efficiently acquiring armament and protection in the Lockdown map of Half-Life 2." The patent describes a specific pattern in which the player moves around the map, picking up weapons and armor, the better to frag enemies into raspberry preserves. Marty "Deth4allu" Lessard allegedly adopts this movement pattern without gaining permission or paying appropriate licensing fees. The judge in the case, 81-year-old Harlan Easterbrook, has difficulty grasping the particulars of the case and interrupts the lawyers several times to have them explain what a grav gun is and how you can use one to kill an opponent with a toilet.
Eventually the case is decided in favor of Lessard, and Judge Easterbrook goes on to dominate the Half-Life 2 Deathmatch ladder.
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Born helpless, nude and unable to provide for himself, Lore Sjoberg eventually overcame these handicaps to become the first person to kill someone with a ball in Wii Bowling.
