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Confetti
The Piranha, a personal paper shredder, makes getting rid of analog files as easy as pushing the Delete key. But before you get carried away with the idea of wiping out that long and compromising paper trail, take note: this Fawn Hall special eats only a quarter sheet at a time, and it eats damn slow. Sure, it's good for chewing up checks and making mounds of confetti – but it wouldn't have gotten Ollie North any closer to the Senate. The Piranha: US$48. Museum of Modern Art Design Store: +1 (212) 708 988.
Toy
No one wants to be the first to admit it, but European ergonomic designs often look vaguely ... well ... sexual, sometimes embarrassingly so. The Anir mouse, invented in Norway, is no exception. But this newly Americanized rodent just might save you from carpal tunnel. It rolls on a mousepad like an ordinary peripheral but keeps your arm at a more comfortable angle. Sure, coworkers may stop and snicker, but you can give them a satisfied grin and say, "You know, it's from Europe." Anir Pro mouse: US$69.99. AnimaX International: +1 (818) 713 9933.
Chirpy
Now that Apple has pulled the carpet out from under the clone market, the Cupertino crowd needs to show Mac users they can supply elite machines on their own. Rest assured. Apple's Power Macintosh G3 is the first Mac OS computer with the fabled PowerPC G3 chip under the hood. The powerful processor, with a speed of 266 MHz, actually runs much faster because of a punchy new memory scheme, called backside cache. Power Macintosh G3: US$2,999. Apple: +1 (408) 996 1010.
Stealth
Gone are the days of interoffice warfare with oversize Nerf guns. The implements of collegial combat have become smaller and more subtle, thanks to the engineers at Yes! Entertainment, a company known for cramming a lot of microelectronics into small, noisy playthings. In the Power Penz laser-tag game, the miniature weapons give immediate feedback – making an ugly sound and emitting a warning light whenever they take a direct hit from another pen. They're perfect for zapping your boss or fellow workers, but you may never want to step clear of your cubicle again. Power Penz Laser Shots set: US$29.99. Yes! Entertainment: (800) 222 9376, +1 (510) 847 9444.
Floater
A 3-foot silver dirigible, the Plantraco Flying Saucer looks like it just flew in from Planet Jiffy Pop. The remote-controlled Mylar balloon will buzz indoors over the heads of friends and coworkers for hours within a 200-foot radius. Twin turbofans propel the ship left, right, backward, and forward. All you need to supply is batteries (of course) and helium, which you can get at most flower shops. To quote Agent Mulder, our contemporary authority on UFOs, "I want to believe." Flying Saucer: US$60. Plantraco: +1 (306) 955 1836.
Long Shot
If even titanium clubs barely carry your ball off the tee, it may be time to pull out the heavy artillery. You don't have to swing the Ballistic Driver at all; a .25-caliber explosive charge behind a strike plate in the club's head will launch golf balls nearly 250 yards down the fairway. Invented by a Silicon Valley engineer to help older duffers who've lost their distance, the driver is easy to load and, for safety's sake, won't operate unless you're holding it to the ground like a golf club. Ballistic Driver: US$798. GPower: (888) 825 2783, +1 (408) 747 0312.
Water Log
Runners and cyclists have had specialized digital pacing gadgets for a while, but swimmers have had to count laps and guesstimate their speed. Designed by Fred Bould, the Strokz watch is the first tool that keeps track of an aquatic athlete's rate, efficiency, and distance per stroke. Strokz works by counting the number of times your arm enters the water – that is, when the water completes a circuit between two electrodes on the watch face. Bould, who trains with a local masters team, even built a rubber strap over the buttons so they'd be easy for waterlogged fingers to push. Strokz Swim Monitor: US$90. Speedo: (800) 547 8770.
Closer
The razor industry has historically ignored one dimension of your face – traditional blades move up and down your mug, but never side to side. Enter the Schick Protector, inspired by the "suspension system of a sports car," according to its designer, Chris Aiston. (It's only fitting that such a manly product would use motor sports as inspiration.) Fact is, this little face mower handles great and looks even better – besides, when was the last time you saw a razor in Ferrari red? Protector: US$5. Schick: (800) 742 8377, +1 (201) 540 2000.
Mouseketeer
IBM's new external CD-ROM drive brings your portable up to multimedia speed. With a flashy design reminiscent of a certain theme-park rat, the drive uses new technology called constant angular velocity, which reads the disc at an increasing rate from inside to outside – so speeds vary from a fair 8X to a blazing 20X. Want to demo your new CD-ROM? Just plug the drive into a notebook's PC slot and let the detachable stereo speakers go to work. The 20X-8X Portable Stereo CD-ROM Drive: US$575. IBM: +1 (914) 765 1900.
This article originally appeared in the February issue of Wired magazine.
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