Given a choice between GoldenEye, a spy simulation on my trusty Nintendo 64, and Missile Mambo, a Web-based simulation of a spy movie on my crusty laptop, I'll choose the one with the Rumblepak. But it wouldn't be a fair fight. The Nintendo cartridge lets me hijack a Russian tank and steamroll over fleeing soldiers, pick off agents with a sniper rifle from 200 yards, and bungee jump off the Byelomorye Dam. Even the tepid thriller from which the game appropriates its brand name can't compete with that. So, how's a Web site that dribbles a pulp pastiche over hundreds of pages going to even rate a nervous tic?
Not purely on the strength of its text, of course. But Mike Heronime, the creator of the Missile Mambo Web "feature," did not sit down at the bargaining table without the benefit of a few secret weapons of his own. The story, a 007-meets-Castro potboiler set in the Kennedy era, brings to mind Ewan McGregor's yarns in the (otherwise execrable) A Life Less Ordinary - too tall to fit in the dumbwaiter. Heronime's execution, however, is really quite extraordinary, composed of a meticulous array of retouched stills drawn from countless period dramas. Thus, George Peppard and Sophia Loren are cast in the lead roles, and cameos from the likes of JFK, Pacino, and Dean Martin are common. The only glaring omission is a walk-on appearance by Forrest Gump, but if anything, it's a merciful flaw.
The scattershot appropriation may not be strictly legal, but it's an inspired (or at least impressively labored) methodology for a narrative Web site. As a full-fledged effort, rather than a small-scale experiment, the site guarantees imitation of some sort - though perhaps only from Heronime himself in subsequent efforts. Let's hope some of the kids put down their joysticks long enough to find a blip of inspiration in the Missile Mambo bricolage. Because it's too late for me.
This article appeared originally in HotWired.
